bad communication is assuming you already know

let's disagree, on purpose.

“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.”

-George Bernard Shaw

Lately, I’ve been craving nuance like a cherry popsicle on a warm summer day.

Everything feels so extreme right now. When I look around all I see is people who agree with each other, or who avoid each other altogether. I tried to remember the last time I witnessed a civil debate that I enjoyed and learned something from, and my mind drew a blank.

But I’m not just worried about the abundance of examples of disagreement around us— I’m concerned about the shortage of models of how we resolve it. I’m scared that this has made us believe that conflict is bad, and that it must be avoided, when it’s a major requisite for relationships. Some might even say that disagreement is the gateway to a deepening and lengthening our relationships. When we don’t know how to argue, we end up isolating. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that loneliness rates has never been so high and that our tolerance for conflict has never been so low. Our social and political environments have taught us that if we can’t get agree, we must separate. And this is a very dangerous precedent to set.