You have given words and form to the rage I occasionally spout at my husband and other proximate males who DGAF about our rights. If they cared, they would ACT. We have all seen what the men we know are capable of doing when they really care about something. Imagine if 1% of the male energy and passion expended on chasing business success and professional sports - or just ONE! One professional sport would do! - were redirected to fight for gender equity.
I couldn't agree more. There's a special kind of rage that comes from words not matching actions from progressive men that can feel more pernicious that the anger that comes from their more overt sexist counterparts. I know I needed to put a word to it so I'm glad it resonated with you.
I love how your writing challenges me to be a better man and requires introspection. I felt every syllable of every word you wrote. I am pro choice, but I admittedly have not been vocal enough. As you clearly pointed out, men, particularly heterosexual men like me have benefited from women’s access to reproductive care, specifically abortion. My life would be different without that access. I definitely do not want history to remember me as a pro choice fuckboy.
thanks for being so open you can share this with us, publicly no less! being an ally is a verb and part of that work is acknowledging the work is never done!
I need to comment but my rage at finding out my demographic is firmly anti-abortion is too overpowering to allow me cogent thoughts. I knew deep down maybe that was the case, but to read it in print. The article doesn’t explore WHY! It literally makes no sense that grandfathers want fewer rights for their granddaughters than their mothers and partners had... my mind goes immediately to “how can I subvert that thinking” ... but... men are like a mule that refuses to move. The mule never tells you why; it just refuses to move. Why? What is bogging them down in this “pro-life” lie?! Here I go, ranting like I said I wouldn’t ...
You pose a really great question, "what is bogging men down?" I wonder if there's any current research that seeks to unconceal the beliefs that underpin this refusal to speak out and take clear action.
Proud to have raised two exceptionally good men and an exceptionally good women. Was it easy? Heck no! Did they get bullied? Yup. Did other parents smirk when my sensitive and intelligent boys spoke up and defended others? Did school administrators scratch their heads when my sensitive and intelligent and kick ass daughter stood up for herself loudly (and assumed a ninja pose) in 2nd grade because a boy pinched her rear? Yup. My kids are the humans they are today because they learned how in their home.
You have given words and form to the rage I occasionally spout at my husband and other proximate males who DGAF about our rights. If they cared, they would ACT. We have all seen what the men we know are capable of doing when they really care about something. Imagine if 1% of the male energy and passion expended on chasing business success and professional sports - or just ONE! One professional sport would do! - were redirected to fight for gender equity.
I couldn't agree more. There's a special kind of rage that comes from words not matching actions from progressive men that can feel more pernicious that the anger that comes from their more overt sexist counterparts. I know I needed to put a word to it so I'm glad it resonated with you.
I sent a request to your gmail to let me pay for a link to this piece in my Sunday Long Read space & sent proposed copy.
I love how your writing challenges me to be a better man and requires introspection. I felt every syllable of every word you wrote. I am pro choice, but I admittedly have not been vocal enough. As you clearly pointed out, men, particularly heterosexual men like me have benefited from women’s access to reproductive care, specifically abortion. My life would be different without that access. I definitely do not want history to remember me as a pro choice fuckboy.
thanks for being so open you can share this with us, publicly no less! being an ally is a verb and part of that work is acknowledging the work is never done!
Hear, Hear
Thank you for saying it just like it is Liz.
I need to comment but my rage at finding out my demographic is firmly anti-abortion is too overpowering to allow me cogent thoughts. I knew deep down maybe that was the case, but to read it in print. The article doesn’t explore WHY! It literally makes no sense that grandfathers want fewer rights for their granddaughters than their mothers and partners had... my mind goes immediately to “how can I subvert that thinking” ... but... men are like a mule that refuses to move. The mule never tells you why; it just refuses to move. Why? What is bogging them down in this “pro-life” lie?! Here I go, ranting like I said I wouldn’t ...
Tomorrow's newsletter will have more solutions to this problem!!
You pose a really great question, "what is bogging men down?" I wonder if there's any current research that seeks to unconceal the beliefs that underpin this refusal to speak out and take clear action.
Proud to have raised two exceptionally good men and an exceptionally good women. Was it easy? Heck no! Did they get bullied? Yup. Did other parents smirk when my sensitive and intelligent boys spoke up and defended others? Did school administrators scratch their heads when my sensitive and intelligent and kick ass daughter stood up for herself loudly (and assumed a ninja pose) in 2nd grade because a boy pinched her rear? Yup. My kids are the humans they are today because they learned how in their home.
A majority of white women voted for trump in 2016 when he ran on a platform of explicitly overturning roe.