I have to check this book out. My sister in law who I have an amazing sib-hood with, sent me a tender message yesterday. My reply was 'I know I don't say it enough but I love you and the one reason why I don't know how to say it is, I was never taught how.' It might have been the realest thing I have said in recent memory. Raised by parents who had a toughen up style of rearing me and spent a lot of my adulthood falling down and learning how to get back up on my own.
Now I have been a behavioral health specialist in the military for 3 years. I help men an average age of 17-22 years of age through existential/identity crises . There is a total lack of the acknowledgement of their emotions. Here they are told they are doing 'god's work' as active duty members and inside they are suffering. So we do our best to reconcile the 2. Luckily we are making strides and saving lives. Thank you Liz Plank and Ruth Whippman for this discussion. It will help a lot of people.
I'm so grateful for Liz's Substack and this insightful interview about the 'epidemic of uncared boys.' It's a topic that truly resonates and encourages deeper thought on how we can better support the emotional wellbeing of boys and men.
As I read through the conversation, I couldn't help but be reminded of the Waylon Jennings and Willie Nelson song, 'Mammas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys.' While the song may have been intended as a tongue-in-cheek warning to mothers about the impracticality of cowboy life, it speaks to a larger issue of toxic masculinity and the dangers of rugged individualism. The 'poor, lonesome cowboy' is a powerful metaphor for the isolation and emotional repression that can come with traditional masculine ideals.
Liz and Ruth's words serve as a reminder that it's crucial for parents to teach their children that they are not limited by their gender, and that they can pursue any path without feeling alone or misunderstood.
Such a great interview. A lot of what Ruth was saying is what I've been trying to say for awhile, but couldn't put it into words quite like she has.
It's rare to find any discussion around topics like this that don't devolve into incel and anti-feminist takes. As well as make me feel wrong for wanting to talk about it.
I just started reading her book and I am almost in tears. Even in a world that caters to me the most, as a cis het white male, this is one of the few times I feel seen and understood.
I feel like I don’t know how to talk to most other men, at least not genuinely, because it’s not a learned behavior. It’s the perception that I’ll be seen as too vulnerable. And from hearing third hand about my wife’s friend’s husbands, a lot of them feel the same way! Seems pretty absurd as I write this…
such great points i missed that gloria steinem interview and while i agree i see your point too. it’s actually easier to be empathetic than to be bitter!
This was fabulous! I ordered the book. :)
What a great interview, Liz! Such interesting perspectives.
Thanks, Liz, for bringing this book to our attention. Very interesting discussion of patriarchy.
This is so powerful. Such a cool read!
I’m definitely reading this book!!! As a feminist and the aunt of 4 beautiful, intelligent and caring boys this is duty!
I have to check this book out. My sister in law who I have an amazing sib-hood with, sent me a tender message yesterday. My reply was 'I know I don't say it enough but I love you and the one reason why I don't know how to say it is, I was never taught how.' It might have been the realest thing I have said in recent memory. Raised by parents who had a toughen up style of rearing me and spent a lot of my adulthood falling down and learning how to get back up on my own.
Now I have been a behavioral health specialist in the military for 3 years. I help men an average age of 17-22 years of age through existential/identity crises . There is a total lack of the acknowledgement of their emotions. Here they are told they are doing 'god's work' as active duty members and inside they are suffering. So we do our best to reconcile the 2. Luckily we are making strides and saving lives. Thank you Liz Plank and Ruth Whippman for this discussion. It will help a lot of people.
I'm so grateful for Liz's Substack and this insightful interview about the 'epidemic of uncared boys.' It's a topic that truly resonates and encourages deeper thought on how we can better support the emotional wellbeing of boys and men.
As I read through the conversation, I couldn't help but be reminded of the Waylon Jennings and Willie Nelson song, 'Mammas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys.' While the song may have been intended as a tongue-in-cheek warning to mothers about the impracticality of cowboy life, it speaks to a larger issue of toxic masculinity and the dangers of rugged individualism. The 'poor, lonesome cowboy' is a powerful metaphor for the isolation and emotional repression that can come with traditional masculine ideals.
Liz and Ruth's words serve as a reminder that it's crucial for parents to teach their children that they are not limited by their gender, and that they can pursue any path without feeling alone or misunderstood.
❤️❤️❤️❤️
This was a very enlightening article. Thank you, Liz!
This is a must read for me! Love your questions Liz!
Such a great interview. A lot of what Ruth was saying is what I've been trying to say for awhile, but couldn't put it into words quite like she has.
It's rare to find any discussion around topics like this that don't devolve into incel and anti-feminist takes. As well as make me feel wrong for wanting to talk about it.
I just started reading her book and I am almost in tears. Even in a world that caters to me the most, as a cis het white male, this is one of the few times I feel seen and understood.
Thank you Liz!
I feel like I don’t know how to talk to most other men, at least not genuinely, because it’s not a learned behavior. It’s the perception that I’ll be seen as too vulnerable. And from hearing third hand about my wife’s friend’s husbands, a lot of them feel the same way! Seems pretty absurd as I write this…
such great points i missed that gloria steinem interview and while i agree i see your point too. it’s actually easier to be empathetic than to be bitter!